How often over the years life felt as if its HEAVINESS would never stop bearing down on me. The days & weeks would grind into the months, and the only reprieve would be the possibility of that long weekend coming or that holiday at the end of the year. How could this thing called emotion actually have a physical weight, why won’t it get off my back & when will I get that bit of time off to just breathe & be.
For years & years I lived the Aussie stigma we are all accustomed to & know of quite well. THE AUSSIE BATTLER. Not just the finances or sustaining a relationship that lasted over 2 years, also battling smoking, drinking, drug & gambling addictions, constantly fighting my weight & fitness, & struggling so much with this taboo invisible force that these woo woo folk call EMOTIONS.
Yep, like the ANZAC’s, I endured my metaphoric battlefield that had it all. Those brave men witnessed life & death and that’s how real ALL of this load I carried felt, enough so, that checking out, of life seemed the logical approach for the burdens not to weigh me down any more, ahhhhh that will be true freedom. That’s how I’ll stop this lifelong piggy back ride.
If I’m not here, how is that truly free. I won’t be able to watch another footy match, laugh with my mates, experience fatherhood, travel this world, smell the fart of a stranger in an elevator, have that awkward moment of laughter pop up at the most inappropriate times. How is that living from that Aussie spirit we are world renowned for? How is embodying that TRUE GRIT
nature? Rather than making this piggy back ride hard yakka- I needed strength in the form an inspiration. WHO COULD GET THROUGH THIS? Who has spirit, grit, strength. So I pondered this- superman isn’t real, a magician is all illusion, Buddha ??? Well I’m not a monk. THOUGH I know who has these traits…
A WARRIOR !!!
Awesome… I have an answer. As a man, even with this weight, I know that if I had an answer I can get it done, every day I’ve still been able to get shit done- through all of the struggle. I’M IN. So, what traits allowed the warrior to possess strength, grit, spirit? A warrior, he is aware of the quest in which he is upon. He is aware of the sharpness of his sword in the hunt, aware of the capacity of his shield in battle, aware of his surroundings for his advantage, aware of when to fight & retreat, aware of the rewards & consequences of his actions, aware of his strengths & even more aware of his weaknesses – so that he may use them as his strengths.
If this weight I carry in life is my weakness, then how do I become the warrior to allow that now to be my also my strength?
*I’ll pause here for a moment – as a quote from one of my coaches is “Power Questions get Powerful Answers”
From this powerful question came this powerful answer – With AWARENESS.
I was then 27, though feel as if I was in medieval days- I now have a Quest & search that may take a lifetime. How do I find awareness, what is awareness & how like the warrior do I allow awareness to show my weakness so I can use as my strength? Enduring, I forged into the unknown. Never had I before learned this, had it taught to me yet alone spoken of. The mystery is intriguing. Gritting my teeth, continuing to hump this load on my back – some weeks I felt great, majority of the months the hustle & mass of life grew enormous. This warrior energy I found started to deplete- several years passed & again I felt the urge of checking out arise.
It occurred to me – that this battle/quest I was facing, I was going it alone. Powerful questions get powerful answer. Who trained the warrior? WOW, a new revelation. My passion of sports sparked this search, every championship sporting team had a coach, even inside the team each individual had a mentor. Again & again & again, coaches, mentors, guides, experts, masters – everyone one had some form of guidance. Researching, asking questions I found that even Michael Jordan, one of, if not the greatest basketballers of all time had a coach that saw he had
a weakness. WTF… I call bullshit.
Delving more he actually did. His coach was able to see that his arm
was kicked out when taking his shot – Michael then became aware of his weakness- possessed warrior energy to turn that to his strength – and turned to his coach and asked a question that as a man blew me away. May you help me with my weakness to allow it to become my strength?
Now into the 32nd year of my Quest, my knowledge to dissolve this piggy back ride was
1/ In awareness, is my power
2/ Every great man had a coach
Over these years, every pain I endured, every heartache I felt I armed myself more & more. How in this battle, this stigma I’m conditioned with, do I show my weakness? Every time I do, I get hurt even more. Each time this vulnerability I show hasn’t become strength. So, I RETREATED, I’ll keep it all in. If no one knows, I can’t hurt me. How then may I turn to a coach and tell him about this weight I carry – How will I know he, like the warrior, teach me the way of awareness?
Boom! Stuck like a Datsun 180B in the soft sand on hide tide
This moment, this exact point in time for me was September 2016. No buttering up, no sugar coating – if I scaled this it would be the most fearful moment in my life. To ask for help, admit my weaknesses, shame, guilt, fears & trust that this wouldn’t be turned against me once again. My toe dipping lasted for months, until one day I mustered the courage to jump on that springboard, tuck into the trusty bomb dive position & decide for myself that the piggy back ride was over, this “weight” on my shoulders has to go – I am a warrior & I’ve found my coach. I AM READY
From a battler to a warrior, from the struggle to becoming aware, from being alone to getting the weight off my shoulders, from one coach to now a team… the quest has & is pretty f%#ing amazing. The ebbs, the flows, the ups & the downs – being aware that experiencing somethings is needed to understand its polar, that there is HUGE strength in the courage of facing off with my emotions, that it ok not to be ok, help is only a question away and that love (especially of myself) is the answer. This has allowed the piggy back ride to cease. Now I see life as a dance to enjoy not a battle to endure.
Now approaching 34 years on this planet, my wisdom I have unlocked
1/ Surrounding myself with a team to help with this load is ok, & will make it easier
2/ I’m not alone
3/ I’m whole, complete & perfect right now- though always evolving
I am a voice for a mankind. My purpose on this planet is to continually grow as a man through my awareness, as to inspire all men (& women) to evolve to into the grandest version of themselves, they desire in this lifetime. To find their awareness.
I ask, when you’re ready to make your splash is it going to be a bomb, a pencil dive or horsey?? There is content everywhere in this generation, thats power of the internet. I can help, guide & coach you to implement all of the tools & practices, so you too can have the weight release from your shoulders faster, in your journey.
I feel you
Blase Grinner / email@example.com / +61 450 695 818
My Men’s Groups – fb page
What is awareness- from a blokes perspective
Everywhere we look there seems to be some kind of promise, a secret weapon if you please, to get an amazing body in no time at all and with little effort as possible… Weight loss organisations promise the loss of 10kg for JUST $10!! They claim you just need to follow their ‘easy’ weight loss program including calorie counting and the consumption of up to 25 ingredients (including chemicals) in simple foods. Other diets claim to have you looking like a supermodel in just two weeks! Don’t forget the ab machines… these will transform you from overweight to having 8-pack abs in just a month! All the while working out in front of the TV with a huge smile on your face, gliding from side to side with the greatest of ease, your mascara staying perfectly in tack with not a drop of sweat to be seen! Exercise isn’t for you? Perhaps a weight loss tea will appeal to you more? Just drink five times daily and vola!
Shakes, wraps, teas, diets, machines… promise after promise of quick and easy weight loss or super abs. Gimmicks! At the end of the day, this is all these things are. Sure you may lose some weight with some, maybe all of these weight-loss approaches but for how long? And how healthy are they for your body?
When I began my study in fitness, deep down I was kind of hoping they would give us the ‘secret weapon’ for a better body… A special set/rep you could perform or a magic diet you could follow. Unfortunately this didn’t happen. What I did learn however, were five REAL not-so-secret weapons that you can use to create a healthier you. I’d like to share them with you.
Yes, you need this! This is what keeps you powering up Moffat Hill, holding a weight above your head, when all you want to do is throw it at your trainer and tell her where to go. This is what keeps you doing the minute of push-up rows when burpees are the penalty for stopping.
How determined are you to get to your goal whatever it may be? Ask yourself, do I have the determination? What is getting in my way of achieving my goal? Am I just half determined? Do I give 100% at training or could I give a bit more?
You’ve probably heard time and time again that summer bodies are made in winter. I hate to be blunt but, unless you have been gifted with the genes of a supermodel (and I can guarantee you that they too must work hard to maintain their figure) and can down a burger without gaining a single inch of fat, then you need to work on your ‘summer’ body all year round. Don’t wake up one sunny summer day, having not got up on those cold winter mornings to train, and expect to be beach ready. Sorry but it just won’t happen! Don’t expect to run a marathon without prior dedication to training. Don’t expect to win a INBA competition without the dedication to training, all year round. Anyone in professional sport will tell you that training does not stop in the off season. It requires dedication all year round, every month of the year. Dedicate yourself to your training (and your trainer) and you will achieve your desired goals.
No, I’m not talking about the banana diet or the starvation diet or the shake diet or even the diet where you consume only 1000 calories per day. I’m talking about your everyday diet, that is, the real food you eat from day-to-day, 365 days per year, every year, for the rest of your life. The food you put in your mouth is what fuels your body. Ask yourself what fuel your body deserves. Eat clean people!! That is the secret to a great diet, nothing else but clean, raw, as close to nature as we can. Stay away from food that contains copious amounts of ingredients and ingredients that you can’t pronounce. Stay away from foods that have high sugar and sodium content. Stay away from preservatives and avoid being trick by manufacturers that label foods ‘natural’. Fresh is the way to go. Organic is even better. Ask your local grocer where your fruit and veges come from. Ask your butcher where he gets his meat. Don’t be afraid to ask questions even if they seem silly at the time. I once had a 45 minute discussion with my egg lady about the pros and cons of feeding chickens protein. I now know what she feeds them, when the eggs are laid, and I can even go and pick them out from the farm if I want. It’s your body and you have every right to know exactly what you are fuelling it with.
Stop sabotaging yourself!!
This is a very important point. When I started training with Mel (about 6-7 years ago) I was training 3-4 times a week. On the floor I was putting everything in, lifting the weight, using great technique, etc. I would physically vomit after some sessions from the amount of effort I was putting in. I was achieving results but not what I should have been achieving… Was this Mel’s fault? Every inch of me wanted to blame her, tell her that she wasn’t giving me the ‘secret weapon’ I was looking for, the short cut that I thought she knew. At the time I remember thinking that she obviously wasn’t doing her job right, she was keeping something from me, not training me right. In reality, I was in denial.
There was no denying I was training hard but… I was also consuming half a carton of full-strength beers a day – yes, that’s right, 12 beers a day! I’d go days without eating and smoke copious amounts of cigarettes. I was really destroying my every chance of obtaining maximum results, not Mel. I was sabotaging myself!! I was not giving myself the respect and health my body deserved. I can guarantee you that if you are not receiving your desired results then you are sabotaging yourself in one way or another. This could include but is not limited to poor diet, alcohol, cigarettes, stress, bad relationships, little water consumption, over-training, under-training, making excuses, not giving 100% in your training session, negative headspace… anything that is working against you in achieving your desired results.
Listen to your trainer.
If your trainer says to rest up, do it. If your trainer says to stop smoking, just do it. If your trainer says to stop eating shit, for the love of God, do it! As a trainer I want to see my clients achieve ultimate results. So does Kim and Mel. We tell you things for a reason, not because we like to hear the sound of our own voices. Every session you do has been tailor made to your specific goals. There’s a reason behind every set, every rep, a method to what sometimes seems like madness. We want to see you succeed, we want you to achieve your goals.
So there you have it. Five ‘not-so-secret’ weapons to a healthier you. If you are not achieving your goals, ask yourself these five things:
- Have I got the determination to achieve my goals?
- Am I dedicated? Do I put in the hard yards?
- Am I fuelling my body with healthy premium foods?
- Am I sabotaging myself? If it’s yes, then how?
- Am I listening to and hearing what my trainer is telling me?
Remember… there is no single secret weapon, no magic pill, no special diet, no fairy dust, no easy way. It’s just one foot in front of the other. One step at a time. Remember that you are all awesome and you deserve awesomeness in your life.